This after I cooked dinner, washed the dishes, cleaned the kitchen and made his lunch.
Your opinions please.Your reaction to what my husband did to me last night?
Speak to him later when all children are sleeping and remind him that how he treats you is how your daughter will seek to be treated some day. Ask him if he would want to kick the *ss of anyone who spoke to and treated her that way? Then hand him a mirror and tell him to start on himself bc his behavior dictates this more than anything else.
That being said, you, also, have an obligation to your daughter. If he can't stop this, do you want to teach her that she must accept being treated badly by her partner? Or do you want to teach her that she decides how she allows others to treat her and she can change it at any point? Your behavior--not your words--is what will teach this lesson. Remember that.
On a final note. You teach people how to treat you, and you can change the lesson plan anytime you need to. Good Luck!!Your reaction to what my husband did to me last night?
I think he is upset about something other than putting the dog up. You need to have an honest discussion with him about what is really bothering him. It is a warning that things are not as good as they could be between you, Or maybe he is upset about something or someone else and is just reacting to that. But if you can get him to stop and think about what the real problem is, then you can address it together and get it solved.
hi. having had similar experiences in my younger days, i soon learned that folk treat us the way we allow them to.
so tomorrow don't cook or clean for him and when he mentions it as he surely will you must say , oh ive been so busy sitting on my .... all day, hopefully he's not the violent type, but if he is then you dont need anyone to tell you what to do.
try a little harder to stand up for yourself, give your daughter reason to be proud and not to allow men to speak to her in that way just because ';daddy did to mummy';
one other thing that works for me is, when a person is rude to me , i raise my voice slightly and say EXCUSE ME they are so taken aback thet they usually say oh sorry that was a slip of the tounge.
good luck and remember NOBODY SHOULD BE AS IMPORTANT AS YOURSELF
That's between you and your husband. You know him. I don't know what it means to put the dog up, but maybe he's used to you doing it. I don't like the way he spoke to you, but perhaps you are used to that kind of language and attitude. Within a marriage, most women do all the things you do. It's not a big deal to be tallied. I would doubt this isn't the first time he has talked to you that way. I am guessing he works all day long? You two need to learn to compromise, and speak more lovingly to each other. And solve problems within your home.
well he shouldnt have been that hateful especially around your child, but it does sound like you were doing a leisure activity that you were enjoying. maybe there were things to get done that you should have done first then done your painting. if you had worked all day and gotten everything done you needed to then decided to sit down and do something you enjoy then that would be ok. just depends what all had gone on before you didn't take the dog out.
you could have said:
';I don't see you helping out today';
';why did you have to make such a rude degrading comment?';
';I don't see you helping our daughter';
';Oh well why don't you come over here and paint it for me';
or just not cook lunch for him anymore and after he asks why you didn't cook him lunch say because last time i did you weren't thankful for it.
that's pretty mean of him, sorry to hear it! if its possible for you to share the roles more in the house it might be more obvious for your husband to show more courtesy. he might have been really stressed about something else and taking it out on you but that's really not appropriate and especially not in front of your 3 year old.
why were you being so lazy and just sitting on your ***! haha no seriously is he always like that or did he have a bad day. I wouldn't make a big stink over it now you should have said something at the time but if it happens again ask him if he noticed all the things you did do maybe he didn't most me don't. lol
That is unacceptable behavior. He blew up over you 1. while you were with children (a big no - no) , 2. for no reason at all, and 3. after you had done a lot of tasks in the home for him.
He sounds snide and disrespectful.
If someone made my lunch, I would be thanking them gratuitously and not deriding them as lazy. He needs a reality check - and a touch of class.
well I can Say that I know what you are going through I have been putting up with it for 12 years...my husband and I are divorced but we live together because of financial purposes...he always calls me names and tells me how sorry I am and I work a 40 hours week and I have two days off and he has one week three days off and the next four days off...so good luck in whatever you decide to do...just keep your focus on your daughter she is the most important
That's when I respond with ';That was inappropriate - you are the adult - act like it.'; My husband rarely makes those kinds of comments - especially in front of our 8 year old - but I use that phrase and it seems to push the point across to him on those occasions when his brain has fallen out on the floor.
Frankly - I would have been beyond pissed off too!
Sounds like you are married to a real jerk. If that type thing continues kick his sorry *** to the curb. I have been married 55 years and it only took me a few mistakes like that to learn to become a human being and start treating her right. Give him an ultimatum and he will get the message. I hope it turns him around.
Good luck
Wow everyone write this negative things about that husband.
Do you even know if he was joking? sometime man don't think when they say something.
And sometimes man get too comfortable in the relationship that they forget to treat the wife with more respect then just talking to his buddies at a poker game.
Forgive him, and just talk to him. let him know that you didn't like what he had sayed. sometimes we are just dumb. :)
Tonight put the dog up (what ever that means) and don't do anything else. Help him understand that you will not except his rudeness or his disrespect. Do not holler, just make it clear.
Maybe he feels you don't carry your fair share of the work load, but that is no reason to be rude. If he has a problem then he needs to come to you and talk about it.
jp
I think he is very rude, disrespectful, unappreciative, stressed out %26amp; overworked. He's bitter. I think you need to understand that men get moody too.. just like we do. Sometimes they take their stress out on us.. which is wrong(I'm not excusing his behavior) You should try talking to him about why he's so bitter towards you. Let him know if he's in a bad mood or stressed out, it's not ok to take it out on you and he should show you more respect.
That definitely wasn't appropriate. He takes you for granted, and obviously doesn't respect you (or he would never talk to you that way).
I've chatted with several women online who have admitted to cheating on, or divorcing there husbands, for just these reasons.
You need to fire back at him. The more of that crap you take, the more he will continue to dish out.
Bored out of my mind today...if you want to IM for a few minutes.
yahoo messenger IM: blarneystone72
Well stop cooking dinner for him, washing the dishes, cleaning the kitchen and making his lunch. If he asks you why you're not doing your chores then say well you know i could but since i'm a lazy ***, i think im just going to sit here and relax
what an asshole! really, he sounds like a dick. BUT might be a good idea to check if he was just joking and maybe you took it serious. because us women have a tendency to overreact. we let our emotions take over. now if he was really just saying that than yeah, hes an asshole. if he was just kidding and you didn't pick it up then let it go.
What's wrong with him? You were just doing an activity with your daughter--it's not as if you were just laying around the house. Either way, it seems too little of a problem for him to burst out like that.
Tell him to do shitt once in a while! tell him that 1. no great language in front of your kid. 2. tell him what you just told us: you slaved over the house all ******** day! 3. leave him, he's just going to keep doing that. just thought you should know.
First,
that was extremely rude of him!
Never cuss infront of a child!
He should be thankful for the things you did do and the hard
work you've done.
And he could have asked nicely or have done it himself!
Was this an unusual isolated incident?
To give him the benefit of the doubt, I would assume he doesn't talk that way all the time....
Ask him tonight if something was bothering him. You noticed he was a bit 'edgy' last night....
He acted very inconsiderate.... But he could have been in a bad mood and probably said feeling grumpy..... If it bugged you alot you should talk to him... But I don't think he should of spoke to you like that in front of your daughter....
It was extremely rude and it wasn't appropriate in front of your daughter.
let him no he can not talk to you like that because pretty soon hes going to verbally abuse you even worse and you no what comes after that kind of abuse
wow thats sad! very disrespectful of him to do to you! go out and get you some be lazy, lie on your back, and enjoy some good pleasure! he's crazy!
Typical man.
Divorce him. He's an abusive pr**ck.
Seems jealous that you are spending time with the 3yr.old and he can't do anything by himself..selfish
Pretty damned sorry if you ask me, [guess you did]
Stay in the kitchen where you belong.
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